A woman died.
An elderly woman is dead and a gaggle of sixty-year-old women want to turn her wake and funeral into a WWE match. What kind of people hear the news that a woman they’ve known for five decades has passed on and say, we’re going to her funeral “locked and loaded” in order to confront…me? Yes, me! A person they’ve never met or spoken to, by the way. Why would they threaten a person they don’t know with a loaded weapon (or mouth), you may ask? An excellent question! I’m assuming because they don’t like that I’m seeing a man who broke up with their friend (after dating her for roughly six weeks)?
Let me clarify. I was engaged to this man (aka ‘Cake’ in previous posts) for two years; together for five. And after a three month hiatus this spring (during which he briefly dated aforementioned friend), we are seeing one another again. Not engaged. Not living together. I’m not sure there’s a definition for what we are, but frankly, it doesn’t matter. We love one another, enjoy each other’s company and that’s enough right now. I don’t need or want a label.
So how are the women who want to confront me at a funeral connected to the woman who passed away? Well, the woman who died was Cake’s mother-in-law (his wife passed away several years ago). These childish sixty-something women were his wife’s friends once upon a time. If I have the story correct, they grew up with her and were close to her mother at some point. Now…how they’re connected to the woman he dated during our break? I don’t know and don’t care enough to ask.
One of these ‘ladies’ (and I use that term loosely) sent Cake a text message when she heard about his mother-in-law’s death. She asked on behalf of herself (and her friends) if he was bringing ‘a date’ to the funeral (meaning me), then wrote she’s ready and armed apparently! Now, if I believed she was actually coming after me with a gun, I’d contact the police and get a restraining order. That would be cause for actual fear, but I doubt that’s the case.
But she clearly doesn’t know me if she thinks I’m afraid of a verbal confrontation. When conveying her message to me, Cake couldn’t help but laugh because he knows…there’s no contest.
There’s a quote from a movie, The Princess Bride, which sums up her foolish notion of verbal conquest. “Never go against a Sicilian when death is on the line!” In other words, don’t think you can outwit or unnerve me during a confrontation of any sort. I have nerves of steel and, unlike most, when provoked my blood pressure lowers and my focus becomes laser sharp. You won’t win. It’s “inconceivable.”
Who raised these women? Honestly! A woman dies and you go on the attack? When will it get through your thick skulls? Cake doesn’t owe you an explanation for his choices and I don’t care if you like me. I hope you all find hobbies or some meaning to your empty lives. You’re little annoying gnats but you mean nothing to me. Clearly you don’t mean all that much to Cake either if I’ve never met you in the five+ years we’ve been together! I sense you once did, but not anymore. Cake’s done.
A woman is dead. If you want to pay your respects, go to the wake and/or funeral, be fucking courteous to the grieving family and guests, and get on with your lives.